How do I overcome physical attraction

5 Relationship Tips: What Keeps Happy Couples Together

Why is that "forever" less common?

Quite simply: the Christian marriage saying “until death do you part” comes from a time when marriages did not last longer than a few years. Today we spend a lot more time together and are more free in our decisions. The couples used to stay together because separation was not socially acceptable.

I doubt whether these couples were happier. I always tell my couples, “If you don't know if you love each other anymore, find out - with all the consequences. Don't waste your wonderful life too long with doubts or the wrong partner. "

What's the most common reason couples break up?

Almost always emotional neglect, actually. In addition to the feeling of love, it also depends on how much importance we attach to the other, for example in the form of time, attention or closeness.

If there is a lack of this and it cannot be clarified with the partner, the risk increases that someone will break up or cheat.

How do you manage to stay close in everyday life?

The most important thing are attachment signals. It starts with a greeting and farewell with a kiss or a hug, or it can be something like bringing the other person's favorite yogurt from the shop.

Interest in the partner, time together for exchange and physical closeness naturally also contribute to this.

What role do arguments play?

Arguing is as important as love and sexuality, but it can also be destructive. The “you are” message, ideally combined with “always” or “never”, is a strong poison, for example.

You equate the other with your actions by generalizations. These accusations can lead to great resistance and often make a meeting impossible.

What makes a good argument?

When we endure that the partner is different, thinks or feels. This is not easy for many because they quickly get into a defensive stance, are right or want to win. The real issue is often lost over this. In an argument you should always ask yourself “What is really important to me?” And keep an eye on the goodwill of the other person.

This also means not to question love as such every time, but only to criticize the topic. After all, we are more than our actions.